Most amazing insects. They start out their lives as black and when they die, they slowly turn this bronze color and look very much like Egyptian scarabs. Most amazing.

Gourmet Magazine

I remember so clearly how Chuck and I would fight over who should read the latest edition of Gourmet Magazine first. And who should have the chance to make one of the recipes in this bible of good food.
And how regretful I felt when, many years after his death, I moved the stash of Gourmet Magazines out of the cupboard and down to the garage.
And now it is going to stop. No more monthly joys, no more a secure source for good food and quaint stories and complicated, but tasteful, recipes.
I am glad that Chuck did not have to see this.
Whenever I search for a recipe and find it originating at Gourmet, I shall think of him and his absolute love of all things of taste.
So rest in peace, Gourmet Magazine. We shall never forget you.

I am a Sucker

I don't much care for sayings on my t-shirts, but at times I feel I have one saying , and in big print,
"SUCKER"
The unlovable mutts that share my house have figured it out a long time ago. However bad they are, and they can be bad, at the end of the day there is always a bowl of food and a place to snooze, oftentimes to the discomfort of this person.
The resident rodents have figured it out. They know I have a hard time killing them, so they reward me by eating holes in my bags of legumes and my t-shirts and undies and, the latest, peeing on the satellite receiver so it has corroded and lost its signal.
And now the cat that has appeared and that I was hoping would keep the rodent population in check, has decided that the food that I leave out for it is fine, but better yet is stuff that is not meant for feline consumption. But HEY, what is the sucker going to do ? They all have me figured out, so maybe a t-shirt with "SUCKER" is just redundant.
They already know.

I am depressed, I am. In a funk. A deep funk.
And why? you might ask.
Well, where to start.
Maybe the endless saga of the pictureless television where the cause was diagnosed as a case of corrosion in the box. And hence my problem as I am the proprietor of said box and therefore the one to get it, if possible, fixed.
Or maybe the fact that this morning as I stumbled out in the kitchen to start the coffee and open the door to the bodega, that door fell off its hinges. Kaboom, and there it was, in my hands with no support at all. Now it is leaning against the wall and giving no protection for the rain.
Or maybe the fact that even when I scream and cajole the mutts to go out at night before we retire to do their business, they mostly refuse if it is wet outside, and then I find turds all over the house in the morning. Blast them.
Or maybe the fact that when I rushed to town this morning to buy cheap wine and doggie biscuits--I got the wine, the biscuits have disappeared from the shelves of the supermarkets--and found on my return that one of the dogs had shat in my bedroom and another ( or the same ) had made a puddle on Chuck's bed, seeping through the cover and the mattress cover and the blanket that I keep there and making a big and nasty stain on the mattress
or the fact that I ignore the basics of security and leave doors open for the stupid mutts to go out if they need to, and they reward me with piles of shit all over the house
or maybe because I had to clamber up and check my water supply and, since it was low, very low, crossing my fingers and turning the pump on ( it has been known to not start ) but it did and then clambering up the ladder again to check the progress of filling the tank.
All this clambering is not at all good for a gent of a certain age.
No matter.
I am in a funk, and at two in the afternoon I said, enough, I am going to open a carton of wine, and that is what I did.
It is almost empty now, and I don't feel any better.
What next ?

I try to keep a sunny attitude. I do. I really do.
I often close my eyes and click my heels and whisper : There is no place like home...there is no place like home.
And then the reality strikes.
Apart from the problems of the blank television screen, which today was diagnosed as a problem with the box, the receiver, I had an unpleasant experience when this morning I tried to open the door to the bodega and it fell off its hinges.
The telly problem can be solved, at a price, and I have started to work on that. The door is a more complex deal because some time ago, noticing that the top hinges were pulling loose, I asked Rey to help me refasten them. He suggested to replace the door with a new one, an iron door , strong and not subject to weather the way a wooden door is.
And I gave him the measures, as he suggested, to take to his work where there just happened to be a person doing this kind of work. And that was it. Rey has not been back since and I have not heard from the maker of doors and now I have no door to keep out the rain.
But I try to keep a sunny attitude. Tomorrow I will go down to the village and see if the local ironmonger will give an estimate.
Tomorrow.

My TV set lost its picture; not the sound, and not the banners running top and bottom of the screen showing the time and channel number and name of the show provided by the satellite company, all that was intact, just no picture.
I did all I knew how to : turn the set off and on. And still nothing
But it would play DVDs, which was how I entertained myself while I was searching for a new, reasonably priced set.
After weeks of search and rejecting the over priced and snazzy flat screen sets, I found in a corner of my super market a few of what must be the last of the "regular" television sets, and I bought one and hauled it home and frantically exchanged the old for this new and virginal, however slightly clunky, set.
And I had sound and banners and absolutely NO picture.
But I can play DVDs on it.
I have come a complete circle and accomplished absolutely nothing.
Oh; as I was installing the new set I had the old one sitting on the couch from where it took a dive and hit the floor. What more ?

How do people take photos with the new digital cameras ?
Every time I grab mine to take a shot of something wonderful, it is low or out of batteries.
Always.
Is there a way to circumvent this ? Like always keep recharging the thing. Or what ?
Today some prehistoric monster insect is sitting on the pillow on the couch where I normally sit at night when watching the telly. It is so awesomely ugly and big that I wanted a record of it.
But the camera is low on batteries, so no photo.
Now nobody is going to believe me when I talk about this monster insect, because I have no proof.
It makes a good story anyway, if only I had somebody to tell it to.
You.